Objective of the Season

To recreate this photo:























It will all be worth it if I do this.

Annextra Happy Christmas

*DISCLAIMER: Awesome Title Pun ©Dan Skilbeck*

Today is probably the first day in about a month where I haven't been either working or snowboarding, so I am currently making full use of walking around in my underpants and drinking litre after litre of Sun-Rype's Strawberry Banana juice. The Christmas period has been a mixture of long, stressful working days and excessively heavy drinking, so it is starting to take it's toll on everyone. Luckily we still have New Years to celebrate the end of Banff's busiest week of the year, and enter the new decade with a big messy bang.

To update on Christmas itself, I was unfortunately working during the day, which was neither merry nor good-willed. Norquay had the extraordinary power of sucking the Christmas spirit from anyone who entered - the blow up snowman wasn't fooling anyone. Luckily, when I got home an amazing xmas feast was in preparation thanks to LJ, Shaun, Neil, and Dan. We had the 'B-team Annex' crew over and played a ridiculous drinking game - making this my first boozy Christmas. And I liked it.















I'm falling ever more in love with Snowboarding. It still smacks me around a bit like a mildly abusive husband, but for some reason I keep come crawling back. Bought new bindings the other day which have met both approval and ridicule. Approval because they're an amazing make of bindings - Ride Beta, and ridicule because they're bright pink. I know they respect me really.

Hope you all had a very happy Christmas where ever you are, and have an amazing New Year. Stay Classy 2009.

The Beginning of the End

I turned 23 on friday, so I'm slowly coming to the realisation that I'm definitely NOT a teenager anymore. This did not, however, stop me from acting like a 14 year old kid who just found his dad's liquor collection in the cupboard under the stairs. The plan was simple: Centurion then Hoodoos. For those who are unfamiliar with Centurions, its basically 100 shots of beer in 100 minutes. This proved much easier than first anticipated, so far more drink followed, including a funnel full of about 7 different drinks. I would go into detail about the rest of the night but it gets a little hazy from then on. All I know is 3 facts. 1) A wrestling match ensued after drinking, resulting in my now infamous Rudoloph cut across my nose. 2) A good old fashioned birthday stripping in the middle of Banff, which meant I had to hop down Banff Avenue in just my top and boxer shorts. 3) I Walked around Hoodoos trying to attract the attention of the ladies, forgetting I had a full blown Herbert Kitchener moustache drawn on my face. I will have to try very hard to beat that next year.

It was also made extra special by the fact I received very generous cards and presents from home and plenty of alcohol from the Gap Year Canada peeps. Not much else to report apart from the fact my job mainly involves staring into the black abyss that is Station 2. I actually spent half an hour today assessing the best technique for loud clapping. I believe you have to position your right hand at a 90 degree angle to your left, then use the four digits of your right hand to slap (not slam) onto the palm of your left hand. I'll keep you updated if I find a better technique, but I seriously doubt it.

Oh, and if you haven't seen the new Iron Man 2 trailer yet, please do. It combines the magical elements of Scarlett Johansson and red hair. My life is complete.

Parents Come to Banff and Casual Racism

The week started with the arrival of Mr and Mrs Turner, which was awesome, especially after 9 days of working. They brought plenty of news from back home and, more importantly, Empire magazine - oh how I missed thee. Took them to both Sunshine and Lake Louise (not Norquay, because quite frankly, it's dire), and spent a lot of the time trying to catch up with my ski pro of a Mum. My boarding is coming along - I can actually turn on my toe edge without feeling like I'm going to die. I also did my first kicker thanks to a bit of encouragement and healthy dose of peer pressure - was ace.















On Wednesday we had the Gap Year Canada Christmas Party, which was held in Noel and Nancy's garage. The theme was Naughty or Nice, so obviously I chose to dress up as a naughty french man - mainly influenced by the fact I had a beret and a stripy top lying at home. The result was a somewhat cliched impression of the french (see above), and would prove to be fatal, when I inadvertedly got involved in a french bread battle with fellow gappers. Not to mention my painted moustache ended up making me look like a Mexican porn star.

The main attraction of the party was the Beer Pong, which involved throwing ping pong balls into the other team's cup to make them drink, whilst 30 or so people crowded around shouting incoherent trash talk to each team. Annex had a team. All I will say is; we did not take the world of Beer Pong by storm. Ended up at Wild Bill's which had a local dj playing some amazing D'n'B (from what I remember anyway), so I inevitably strut my funky stuff.

Back to work, which sucks. I work with a German guy called Chris who has been joking that I'm Australian for about 2 weeks. Apparently this joke doesn't get old.

Obligatory Bragging Photos: Part 1

My view in the morning at work. Nice.

I'm a Lumberjack and I'm okay.

So I had my first day at Norquay ski resort today as a Lift Attendent - Attendent being the key word because we have to be attentive at all times. Well, this is according to my manager. I'm pretty sure he's the only man on the planet who can use the word 'safety' 30 times in one sentence. My job pretty much entails slowing the chair down for when people get on and diving for the stop button anytime some poor child gets caught under the chair lift. It seems like a pretty sweet job and the people are all really cool, so happy days. And before you ask, I'm not quitting GAP, I'll just be working there 3 hours a week (which was what I was working there anyway. I'm not even kidding).

So finally feeling like I'm actually living here, instead of having an extended holiday.

Bought a plaid lumberjack shirt the other day which is making me feel a little more Canadian (self indulgent photos up soon). Regardless of this fact, I still get asked which part of Australia I'm from. Still hitting the town hard on certain nights, but not nearly as much as I'd like to. Apparently there's a dubstep night coming up at Hoodoos which would be great, as I'm getting a little bit sick of The Black Eyed Peas' I gotta a feeling. Oooooo, oooooo.

And I'm starting to think my blog titles are way better than the blogs themselves.

The times they are a changin'...

They certainly are. People have begun working so the party times have somewhat declined. Not that that's a bad thing, since I could do without spending ridiculous amounts on rye and gingers every single night. GAP (or Gay and Proud as my housemates call it, those crazy kids) is going good. I spend most of my time folding jeans and putting things back in the wrong place. Not exactly fulfilling work but it beats becoming a male prostitute. On a more positive note, had an interview for a part-time lift operator at the Norquay ski resort, which would allow me to get a free ski pass. And even better, they said there might be an opportunity to film a new training video for the resort. It'll hardly be the new Citizen Kane, but at least it would allow me to demonstrate some of my rusty filmmaking skillz (notice the 'z' there).

Went snowboarding for the second time today, and whilst I feel like ragdoll falling down a mountain, I think its starting to click. Which is nice. I think I might get some crappy skis as well, just to remind what it feels to be able to stand on snow without falling on my arse ALL THE TIME.

Oh, and also we got an Xbox360 with Guitar Hero World Tour.

It. Kicks. Ass.

Hasta la victoria siempre!

So it was Halloween the other night, and in true Canadian style we were made to get very drunk and parade around town in very skimpy costumes. Luckily I chose a costume that would allow for maximum bagginess and limited revealiness, unlike my other 'zany' (yes, we're bringing this word back) housemates who spent half the night undressing most of their outfits just to take a piss. [Note to self: must get morphsuit when I return home] Turns out not many people know who Che Guevara is around these parts, as I got many shouts of 'terrorist!', 'Saddam!', and 'Fidel!' - but I suppose I can forgive the last one. I even got a couple of guys (who were dressed up as hobos at the time) into an argument about the precise roles Fidel and Che had in the Cuban Revolution. So it was an odd night, and was unfortunately cut short by the fact I had work the next day at 7am.

Yep, got a seasonal part time job at GAP. How very Canadian. Spent my first day undressing female manikins and filming a GAP Christmas video... it was strange. And considering how hungover and tired I was, most of it felt like a really unpleasant dream involving lots of denim. I start officially on Wednesday - depending if I haven't quit by then, hi yohhh!

Rest of life is going well. Some Gap Year people have gone snowboarding already, but I thought I'd wait until the real snow comes. That and I want to save money. Luckily I got my tax rebate through this morning which was a very welcome lump sum - boo ya!

Anyway, enough nonsensical exclamatory sentences.

Peace.

Happy Families

As you can see from our surprisingly photogenic family photo above, the Annex chalet is now full, and I couldn't be happier. Starting from the left: Neil, Lucy, Shaun, me, Josh, Dan, Ceri, Ben, and LJ. As the 'oldies' (yes, apparently anything above 20 is old), we've been rocking the drinks, eating far too much food, and uniting over our love of quoting Family Guy. 'Back Scratcher!' is becoming a firm favourite. The brand new HD TV is also helping starve off the boredom until the snow starts.

Highlight of the week so far has been an Annex family curry, followed by much whiskey at the local english pub, The Pump and Tap. Apparently having a few football shirts on the wall and showing the occasional Premiership game constitutes as an english pub here.

No confirmed job yet. Still hanging onto this music library clerk job at the Banff Centre as it pays a healthy $15 an hour and just sounds awesome. Although I think they're looking for locals.

Since I'm mostly watching lots of TV and hanging out with British people, I'm finding it quite easy to forget exactly where I am, but today was a good reminder. Climbed up our local mountain (you can tell you're in the rockies when you have a local mountain), and as it was such a clear day the view from the top was absolutely breathtaking.

Fucking. Love. Canada.

I have a sexy new pair of snowboard boots.

Yes I do.

Limbo

After successfully getting and quitting my job at the cinema after a day (yes, I know, its a new record for me! But trust me, it was balls), I am now in a state of jobless limbo. I apparently have a job lined up at Norquay ski resort, but who knows what doing or when it starts. So feeling a bit motionless at the moment. On the plus side, I seem to have conquered my fear of ice skating and am now keen to get involved in some Ice Hockey action.

After some very sound advice from a very close friend (I told you you'd get a mention), I am now looking at my time in Canada in a new light. It was never gonna be a holiday, and I think I underestimated this fact. I am now viewing it as a very unique experience, one I will probably never do again so I must make the most of it!

Aaaanyway. Getting more people move into our chalet today which is exciting, then I think we're off to Canmore (local town) for some scooby doo exploration fun. Hope all is well at home.

Jobs, Jobs, Jobs

After spending far too much money in only my first week, I've come to the conclusion that I need a job, and quick. Had an interview at the Fairmont Banff Springs Hotel (which looks remarkably like the hotel from The Shining: http://www.discoverholidays.ca/images/tour/ab-fairmount_banff_springs_.jpg), for what was essentially a pot washing job. The interview was 45 minutes long. And probably tougher than my interview at Cambridge University Press. For washing pots. And they said I might have to shave my beard off.

So yeah, might look elsewhere. Got an interview at the local cinema today, which should be cool. And I'm also interested in getting a bus tour job, as all you have to do is make sure people have paid and talk to Japanese tourists all day.

And, oh yeah, Zombieland is awesome.

Floss is Boss!

(DISCLAIMER: Apologies to those actually interested in my time here (you beautiful stalkers you) for only just updating my blog after 5 long days. I have either been out walking, drinking rum, or generally hanging.)

So I woke up today next to a destroyed Subway wrapper with thoughts of shame running through my head, much like that episode of Peep Show where Jez can't quite remember what 'the bad thing' was (it's here if you havent seen it: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gCL-qnBQzUo ). Although, I should point out that my night didn't end with me sucking someone off. I did however snort rum, made an embarrassing miming rendition of Mr Brightside, and got into a dance off with an extremely drunk aussie bloke in the middle of Hoodoos (our local club).

Moving swiftly on from 'the banter'. It is beautiful here. The view from my window is a fucking mountain (see below. And I know you can't see it in the photo because it's snowing, but it's there, alright!?). I still can't quite believe it.














Anyway, will try and come up with some interesting updates soon.
Promise.

Packed.

Yup.

The Long Goodbye

Over the last 5 days I have been slowly saying my farewells before my departure on Friday. These celebrations have included:

• Eating a deceivingly hot chili at my work leaving curry and nearly passing out.
• Getting kicked out of Kambar for referring a wrestling match between my housemate and our neighbour.
• Having best mates from home stay with me in Cambridge.
• Staging a fake Christmas dinner with the family.
• And commemorating the final episode of The Wire with dinner and drinks (it's meant a lot, ok?).

And I can honestly say, I feel emotionally and physically drained.

The questions of nerves and excitement have taken their toll, as I no longer feel anything but a little anxious. This maybe because I literally don't know what to expect, or that I'm leaving many great friends behind, or that the 5 days of solid drinking have left me emotionally void. Either way, I just want to get on a plane now and see what Banff has to offer.. apart from the numerous gift shops and stray Moose.

The Countdown Begins...

Two weeks to go.

Visa - Check
Accommodation - Check
Insurance - Check
Flights booked - Check
Sick feeling in stomach - Check

I think I'm as prepared as I can be. Planning to buy all my snow gear when I'm out there so I don't need to worry about that. Just wish I had a job...

Would love to get a job at this place called The Banff Centre. This is where the annual Banff Film Festival is held, and all other theatrical events. Looks pretty sweet: http://www.banffcentre.ca/

The Million Dollar Question

First of all, I have to ask myself: 'Why am I doing a shitty little travel blog?'

I must admit, I could probably count the number of blogs I have read with the fingers on my right hand. I've had no interest in reading, writing, commenting, criticising, praising, defacing, or rating blogs. To me, they've always felt like long lists of trivial and self-indulgent insights into people's duller-than-watching-a-puddle-evaporate lives. With a few exceptions (most notably UltraCulture - a very good film blog), many blogs have failed to make me read past the first page.

With such an indifferent attitude towards this 'Internet Phenomenon', why have I suddenly decided to jump onto this very old and dilapidated bandwagon? Whatever reasons I have, they are completely selfish. I don't really care what people find 'interesting' or 'exciting'. I am doing this purely for me. It's a chance for me to record and recount a very new experience in my life; my Big Canadian Adventure (or BCA if we wanna start an acronym early). For those of you who don't know, I will be living and working in the Canadian Rockies for 8 months in a small town called Banff (it's a bit near Vancouver). Considering most of the things we do are now technologically recorded in some public forum anyway - be it facebook, twitter, texting etc. - I might as well spill every last embarrassing detail of my waking life into this diary-esque format.

I will try and avoid the most common cliché of the travel blog: boasting. As soon as a blog sounds like it's just listing all the great things they are doing, and probably you'll never do, I switch off. I have no time for badly written accounts of crazy late night parties on a beach, or scuba diving next to a basking shark; because at the end of the day, they all sound the same. If you copy and paste most people's travels to South East Asia on top of one another, 97% of the trip will overlap. As hackneyed as it sounds, the only way to understand what they're jabbering on about is to do it yourself.

So for those of you who are interested in my trip (I salute you for getting this far), I will do my best to make this blog as informative and enjoyable as conceivably possible. And most importantly, it will be honest.

To (rather unnecessarily) sound like a 1950s Greaser - sugar coating just ain't my style, baby.